Onward into March. Today I sit thinking about writing. About what it used to mean to me. Does it still feed my soul the way it used to? Is it still "worth" doing? Was it really all about money and not about who I want to be/what I want to do? Doubt is rising like the sun this morning and there are no clouds masking it from my sight. Do I want to write anymore?
So far, life outside of writing has been so incredibly interesting and mostly fulfilling lately that I really don't know the answer to these questions. There is a hole in my soul. I'm not sure writing fills it anymore. And yet the thought of not writing; I'm always thinking, "when I get back to writing I will...", is daunting. Writing has been so much a part of my life for so very long that I don't know how to think about not doing it. Procrastination has taken the place of my love for writing. I feel like I'm whining, "It's sooooo hard," and that is true at times. Then I go into the downward spiral of "I don't want to market my work. I want someone else to do that part. It's so expensive." Poor me. I'm having a pity party.
All these thoughts spin me around like I'm on a merry-go-round, but it's not nearly as fun. So, after my daughter's wedding in 17 days (which I am hugely excited about!), I will sit down with myself and make a decision about what I want to do with my life and my writing.
Anyone else feeling like this? Any advice for this "mid-life writing crisis?"
I'm skipping the IWSG question this month and going straight to...
Please visit our co-hosts for this month and remember to thank them!
Diedre Knight, Tonya Drecker, Bish Denham,Olga Godim, and... JQ Rose!