Participating in the “First Loves” blog got me to thinking about what came after the first? Now it’s true what I wrote about my first love, but this does not mean I haven’t gone on to find someone even more important. Because I did, have done, and even though it took me awhile to figure out what “true love” really means, I did eventually get there!
My “Love of my Life” has come to me on slow but steady wings. I did not always pay him the due he was owed, but then neither did he with me. We took things too seriously. We had issues to work on like anyone else. A long time ago I saw a movie that I think was called “Baggage.” All through this movie a woman is carrying a suitcase that gets progressively heavier as her life plays out. I don’t remember how it ends (I was 8 or 10 maybe at the time?) but I remember the message. Everyone has baggage that they carry with them and bring to any relationship they have.
It’s what we do with that baggage that defines us. You watch any movie, read any book, listen to any broadcast and you find baggage behind that emission. Whether it’s fiction or non-fiction there is always back story and it influences the conclusion of that emission.
My husband and I’s back stories/baggage/history got us in a lot of trouble to begin with. But we stuck out our “marriage” together. I think in reality that we each saw something in the other that we wanted more than we wanted our individual baggage. I don’t know what the future holds for us but what I do know is that we honestly made mistakes and worked through them to find ourselves better people, and so have a future to look forward to. We had A LOT of help doing this. By no means did we do it in a bubble.
What I have come away with is the truth of my love for this man. I am cradled in his love for me and feel blessed for it. But what truly astonishes me and makes me smile is that I have learned how to love with no expectations and a lot less ego. I love unconditionally, not in the Hollywood sense but in the real, down-to-earth, life-is-real sense. He is the love of my life and I am both grateful and excited that I found this out while I/we still have time to enjoy it, and boy do we!